How to go deep when you have a narrow ‘window’..

For a generation of us 1970s children watching ‘Play School’, it was the round, square, or as a special treat, the arched window we could choose to dive through.

Now it’s time to look through the narrow window.

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Like those defensive slits in castle walls (what are they called anyway?) is your 2 hour window when your youngest is at nursery/you have available time to go deeper.

Your new ‘baby’ (your brilliance, your business, your calling) is crying for your attention and you want with all your heart to give her the focus she needs to grow and thrive, but you just cant seem to go deep quickly enough to feel like you’re getting anything done. The urgent becomes the enemy of the important.

So from the self employed trenches with mud spattered children, here goes with 10 brilliant ways to go deep quickly when you’re barely there

  1. Develop pre-laptop rituals. Choose music that will get you grooving, savour your favourite brew and most importantly, before you open that lid, take time to enjoy your breathing and connect. Ask yourself, “What (or who) is at the heart of my work today?”, and listen.
  2. Be deliberate in choice of place. If you need to write, is there a cozy corner in the house you associate with creativity. A favourite notebook and pen may let words flow freely without attachment. Make those important, find-me-something-else-please-anything-really, calls now, away from your laptop, before you even open it, if it helps to quieten the strains of distraction
  3. Have an intentional ‘plan’ in advance rather than just sitting down to ‘start work’. Choose a time in the week (Sunday eve?), when you can have fun with paper and colour, sketching out in patterns and words how you want your week to look and feel. Build in everything you would like, including the atmosphere at home, food you’d like to cook, conversations you want to start, work projects you plan to tackle. Weave these into your weekly plan for a satisfaction fix: the measure of your day becomes so much more than just the ‘amount’ of work you managed.
  4. Structure your windows – so they feel more spacious. Use this fab quadrant as a guide to real-life narrow-window working.photo-20                           What’s realistic? What is the best use of my ‘mood’ (call it ambience..) today? Notice your energy patterns within your work time. Give the all your energetic time to your top priority – especially when it’s the hardest thing to tackle
  5. Use the rhythm and focus of dedicated time – Tuesdays social media and marketing day, Wednesdays writing, Thursdays meetings in town?
  6. Name your working hours. Claim them as your working hours. Say no to those ‘nice to do’, ‘ought to do’, ‘well I am at home so I might as well’ things that come your way. This also involves the decision to walk past the laundry, washing up on your way to the work you long to do.
  7. Get some exercise. This ones a tough one for the narrow window. Could you start cycling your children to school (or wheeling your bike), so you’re breathing deeply and differently on the way home? Take the long route home. The 15 minutes will pay dividends in productivity. And discuss Saturday mornings/early mornings (if you’re into that kinda thing) with your partner as a place for a ride/run/class, preferably with a friend of group to keep you company and keep you there.
  8. Name a day a week/a fortnight/a month when you just ‘hang spring cleaning’ as Mole did in chap 1 of Wind in the Willows as he threw down his broom, scrabbled up into the warm air ‘jumping off all his four legs at once, in the joy of living and the delight of spring without its cleaning’. Consciously stopping, refreshing, being renewed is so important. If you’re good at that, as as mums most of us aren’t let’s face it, do it spontaneously. If not, book it into your diary. “I’m sorry, I have an appointment with my life that morning”, you can say smiling sweetly.
  9. Have a wind down ritual as you prepare to reengage with your children, starting perhaps with a music alarm 10 minutes before you have to leave. Stop (yes, I know how hard that is when you’re in the ‘flow’), jot down 3 points to pick up tomorrow, close the laptop/phone. Notice and enjoy your breathing again. Gently finish this sentence in your mind, “I’m building…for the sake of…”, and be thankful for the vista you can now see.
  10. Be wholehearted as you return to the twilight zone of a school community and the life of your child. Picture how you want to greet them. Imagine your warmth and the look on their face as you reconnect. Name in your mind one thing you want to do or discuss with him/her this afternoon.

I’ve been self employed for 12 years, 10 of those with children. Want an end to the halfhearted feeling? I can help you move into wholehearted action, in your work and your mothering. Explore my 1-1 Clarity, Cut and Brilliance Coaching packages.  If you’re serious about taking a leap, contact me for your commitment free coaching ‘taster’ session.

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